Church Sittings

Not long after I graduated from high school, my family got together for some reason–I can’t remember why. But it included cousins and extended family. We decided to all go to church on Saturday night and I sat with my cousin Crystal and a few other members of our family.

We were quite respectful for the most part, but if you’ve ever been to a Catholic mass, then you know the routine: stand up, sit down, kneel, walk, sing. Stand up, sit down.

The first time we stood up, I couldn’t help but notice that the older lady in front of us had a generous derrière. Upon standing, she had quite a, how do you say it? Okay, I got it–a wedgie. Her dress was about half the length it should have been in the back and NO ONE NOTICED IT BUT ME. I took care of that as I elbowed my cousin and pointed to the offending dress in question.

I figured it was not a big deal, but Crystal let it out in a burst of laughter which she quickly quelled by slapping her hand over her mouth. It was very difficult after that to keep our thoughts focused on the sermon and prayers, but we struggled through it.

I remembered that today as once again I was in church, but this time I was by myself and couldn’t share the same scenario with anyone. This example was an older gentleman. He wasn’t in a dress, though.

I’m not making fun of them. I have had wardrobe malfunctions before and I appreciate it when someone tells me about it.


3 thoughts on “Church Sittings

      • I was raised protestant, so I don’t know how different it is. But my dad taught a Sunday School class that started at 9, so we went to both services. Then by the time church got out and they talked to all their friends, it was after 1 pm. So awful.


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